Math never tried to solve any of my problems.
Why yes, YouTube, I *did* want to watch part 5 when part 2 ended. How did you know?
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turns out im not nearly mature enough to hang out with someone named titi
The grass is fuckin greener wherever you water it…….
[looking up at bird sitting in a tree whilst on 1st date]
“I didn’t know birds could climb trees”
Glad the lady in front of me decided at the last second to stop at the yellow light as I prefer to eat my fries from the dashboard.
Captain Hook hated Paper Scissors Rock since he could only play Question Mark, which had no value in the game.
I’d expect Captain America to be fatter.
“Have a seat”
*Turns on video of son eating pizza with a fork and knife.*
“Dad I…” **Dad puts up hand* “Please don’t call me that.”
Does the Defense have any last words?
*defense rises* DE-FENSE
*Judge holds up picket fence*
*Jury starts The Wave*
ONLINE QUIZ: “According to your answers, the Sorting Hat says you are a: —HUFFLEPUFF—”
BIG BAD WOLF: Whaaaaaat?? That has to be the stupidest thi– oooh, I get it…