Don’t pay your taxes. Get sent to a cool ass prison. Boom, now taxes pay you. Life hack.
Lost my car keys so I’m forcing the guy at Home Depot to make me new ones based on what I remember about them.
Asked a Target employee if I could open this camera before I buy it and he said he wouldn’t even care if I killed someone in front of him.
Leaving my browser history open in case anyone in this coffee shop tries to steal my laptop when I’m in the bathroom.
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The best part of being a girl is not having to open doors. If I approach a door and a guy isn’t there I just take a nap til one shows up.
I take it personally when I let a car cut in front of me and then they immediately get into another lane. Come back you are with me now.