Standup desk? Sure then I’ll pay someone to whack me in the kneecaps too
I’m sorry I joined the zoom with my flames of hell background
How many birds do you think you could have on you before you’d panic
Before I got a phone I used to just stare at my right hand all day
my coworker told me she caught a cold from me that i faked
*holds seashell to ear*
“We’ve been trying to reach you about your car’s extended warranty”
A hot guy at my job asked me if I had any plans and I told him 15 because I thought he said plants
Apparently, “in California” wasn’t the right answer to my boss asking where I see myself in five years