@ThatBrenna

Just for fun, I think I’ll get fitted for a casket and just use it as a coffee table until the big day comes.

@ThatBrenna

What kind of therapist does a cat see?
A pspspsychologist

@ThatBrenna

West Side Story gave me the wrong impression. No one at this gang fight is a good dancer and I’ve been shot in the arm.

@ThatBrenna

If you lose a tooth in a bar fight and put it under your pillow, the tooth fairy will leave you $100 because you’re hardcore.

@ThatBrenna

*takes cat from pocket of doctor’s coat & holds it over patient*

He has finished his scan. He says he doesn’t like you & you have cancer.