They say every piece of bacon takes 9 minutes off of your life expectancy. So according to my math, I should have died somewhere around the spring of 1483.
If this virus gets any more toxic I’ll probably end up dating it.
I want to lose weight, but I don’t want to get caught up in one of those “eat right and exercise” scams.
If drinking too much alcohol makes you an alcoholic, does drinking too much Fanta make you fantastic?
Most of my one night stands happened because they knew they would get a fabulous breakfast the next morning.
Nothing freaks me out like when I’m ordering from a Chinese restaurant and I ask “What kind of meat is that?” and they answer “yes”
Is there such a thing as filthy clean? Let’s take a shower together and find out.
Nothing freaks me out like trying to remember which brownies I packed in my son’s lunch box