Not sure if you’ll like golf? Walk on a treadmill for four hours under a sun lamp then throw away $75 when you’re done.
The hoodie & shorts combo outfit, because you almost understand how body heat works.
Shampoo is much more marketable than it’s original name, Shamshit.
You call it armed robbery, I call it people giving me gifts to celebrate my new gun!
I love that sexy thing you do, what’s it called again? Oh yeah, me.
When people shorten words for no reason it makes me want to commit murds.
Sometimes blank stare is the correct answer.
Over 400 billion people a year are victims of exaggerated statistics.
A model train set is the male equivalent of 25 cats.
Venus Williams should marry Bruno Mars and become Venus Mars.