@AwkwardAndOdd

I know I’m short but if you ever try to pat me on the head I will bite your ankles

@AwkwardAndOdd

Remembering the time a guy asked me out but he was really cute so I panicked and replied “I can’t, I forgot to buy cheese”

@AwkwardAndOdd

I’m Scottish so when people don’t like my tweets I just assume it’s because they can’t understand my accent

@AwkwardAndOdd

I don’t always have time to call people back but when I do I don’t.