@kimtopher22

There’s no graceful way to shove a chocolate truffle in your mouth during an important Zoom meeting.

@kimtopher22

I was not ready for the 70yo couple at the doctor’s office go from ones concern for the other’s low blood sugar to screaming at each other about talking too loudly. Right next to me in an almost empty waiting room.

@kimtopher22

If I could go back in time and choose you again, I wouldn’t.

@kimtopher22

“What if it makes me look stupid,” she said redundantly.

@kimtopher22

Fast and Furious 75: Tricked out motorized scooter racing in the assisted living bingo hall.

@kimtopher22

I was offered a brownie at work and when I opened the box, it was filled with brown colored letter E’s.

@kimtopher22

If a Zombie Apocalypse happened today they’d all starve to death.

@kimtopher22

The next COVID variant will be named Optimus Prime, followed by Bumblebee and Rachet.

@kimtopher22

There should be a dimmer on refrigerator lights so you’re not hit with full sunlight blast when you’re cruising for food at 3 a.m.

@kimtopher22

I found a pair of black rimmed glasses in my purse and they’re not mine and I’m worried Superman won’t be able to turn back into Clark Kent without them.