@loribuckmajor

Wrapping gifts and one kid has more than the other so to even it up I hope she likes this bag of potatoes.

@loribuckmajor

Posted a photo of my clean house on Facebook and it was flagged as fake news.

@loribuckmajor

Ok you with pneumonia, go sit between the perfectly healthy lady and the guy with the blood shooting out of his leg

and wait.

-hospitals

@loribuckmajor

Each time my husband yells for the Warriors an angel (me) uses his credit card.

@loribuckmajor

Made plans to exercise with a friend and now I have to go get in a car accident.

@loribuckmajor

After exercising and eating right all week on Saturday I’m like the Kool-Aid man running into Chipotle.

@loribuckmajor

Based on Harrison’s choice of best place to land, golfers are the most dispensable.

@loribuckmajor

“HOW MUCH FOR THE GREEN SMART CAR?”

“Ma’am, that’s a watermelon”

@loribuckmajor

Putin takes over entire world while everybody searches for the missing plane.