@loribuckmajor Wrapping gifts and one kid has more than the other so to even it up I hope she likes this bag of potatoes.
@loribuckmajor @loribuckmajor Posted a photo of my clean house on Facebook and it was flagged as fake news.
@loribuckmajor Ok you with pneumonia, go sit between the perfectly healthy lady and the guy with the blood shooting out of his leg
and wait.
-hospitals
@loribuckmajor Each time my husband yells for the Warriors an angel (me) uses his credit card.
@loribuckmajor Made plans to exercise with a friend and now I have to go get in a car accident.
@loribuckmajor My cat yells at me like she’s my mother.
@loribuckmajor After exercising and eating right all week on Saturday I’m like the Kool-Aid man running into Chipotle.
@loribuckmajor Based on Harrison’s choice of best place to land, golfers are the most dispensable.
@loribuckmajor “HOW MUCH FOR THE GREEN SMART CAR?”
“Ma’am, that’s a watermelon”
@loribuckmajor Putin takes over entire world while everybody searches for the missing plane.