Genetics are weird. Like only 1 of the kids got my hair color but all of them got my husband’s inability to fully close a drawer.
Objects in motion tend to resent objects on the couch not in motion.
Two sales people approached me at the furniture store. I’m following the one who called me Miss. The Hello Ma’am one should take note.
Snow is magical. It turns 6 parking spaces into 4.75 parking spaces.
My husband got new earbuds. Think I’ll skip the middle man and put them straight in the washing machine.
Instead of saying a package is Family Size, it’d be more helpful if it listed a time frame, like 3 Hours Worth of Cookies.
I have 11 pictures of myself from high school. My daughter has 11 pictures of herself from this morning.
Dear Cereal Makers,
Exactly how tall do you think kitchen cabinets shelves are?
I painted 1 room & then the hallway and room next to it looked kinda shabby and I’m guessing this is how plastic surgery gets out of hand.
My grocery store changed its whole layout. It was better the other way so I’m slowly and quietly moving everything back.