Watch James Cameron’s spectacular vision to take 3 hours to tell a storyline that could’ve been an e-mail
(Now in theaters)
[Star Trek: The Next Generation)
Picard: Why are they firing at us?
Troi [an empath]: I sense hostility.
Squirrel guest: *tail twitching like crazy*
Jimmy Fallon: HAHAHA that’s so great
I’m piloting an SR-71, capable of flying speeds above Mach 3. 85,000 feet above earth, my shadow passes directly over a small town in rural Kansas where there is only one Dairy Queen and one McDonald’s—
My phone: WOULD YOU LIKE CONNECT TO MCDONALD’S WI-FI???
Do you want a straw or do you want a STRAW?
Windows: Would like to…
⚪️ Update and restart
Me: I’d like to restart
If only there was a way to brag about how we cut our oatmeal.
– inventor of steel
Feel. He’s so soft.
Inventor: …And so these closed captions will help a lot of people.
Investor: I can see what you’re saying.
when everyone’s out sick and you’re the only one working in the office all week
There are many to choose from but my favorite quote from the Godfather is when he says “it’s-a me, The Godfather”
Optometrist: You have 2020 vision.
Me: But my vision sucks.
Inventor: It’s a jackhammer.
Investors: This is groundbreaking.