*jingles half the way*
There is a trend of babies being named after characters in “Frozen”.
“That’s Stupid” says a 24 year old named Ariel.
Sorry I yelled “chug it” to your baby, as you were breastfeeding.
*rips finished page from adult coloring book*
*puts it on daughter’s toy kitchen fridge*
Wife: Where did all this glitter come from?
Me: Jake, at State Farm.
Working on a screen play that involves zombies invading a prom. I’m calling it “Prom Nom Nom”
A death metal song about an Excel spreadsheet not doing what I want.
I haven’t swam competitively since I was a sperm.
Captain America outsources much of his crime fighting to Captain India.