Me to my daughter who is in the swimming pool: I have some water if you need some.
Daughter: *looks around* I have plenty. Thanks.
The news keeps talking about how someone is in a “very uncomfortable space”. And in my mind I keep yelling back, “WHAT, LIKE THE BACK OF A VOLKSWAGEN?”.
Google maps: You’ve arrived.
Me: *fluffs hair* I know! Right?
This dude is ready for anything you could possibly throw his way. He definitely always understands the assignment.
My house isn’t messy.
Roses are red
Xanax is blue
When one just won’t work
Go ahead and take two
Much like Apple products, I also, am only compatible with myself.
*puts on pickle costume*
*gets stuck in pickle costume*
Could you please help me?
I’ve gotten my myself into a pickle.
I’m gonna try this if it ever happens me.
If Disney movies have taught me anything, it’s that the whole ENTIRE world speaks English. Including animals and inanimate objects.