@HushJared Krang: My robot body will crush my enemies but they will always be reminded of my brainpower because they will see me through a window!
Henchman: In the h-
K: In the stomach, yes!
@HushJared @HushJared [pronounces lasagna like bologna]
@HushJared dating a tall girl is cool until you make her mad at a picnic and she steps to the other side of the river
@HushJared What’s good for the Michigoose is good for the Michigander
@HushJared Boss: Did you get my email?
Me: Yes. It had italics, all-caps, and highlighting and I had no idea how to prioritize that information.
@HushJared “I’ve got a couple of ideas I wanna run by you this afternoon,” my coworker threatened
@HushJared All I’m asking is, has anybody heard from Captain Planet since David Attenborough arrived on the scene?
@HushJared Most adults have thirty-two teeth but you can have as many as you like if your pockets are big enough
@HushJared i bring a card table with me where I go for thanksgiving in case the host’s furniture is too heavy to flip
@HushJared Her: What are you thinking about right now?
Me: If I was an eel I’d have a little fish that lived in my mouth and I’d never need to floss