@amydillon All these people casually jogging down the street, and then me, looking like I’m trying to pull an invisible dog sled.
@amydillon Funny how this Target cashier says “Merry Christmas” like she’s not going to see me 50 more times between now & then.
@amydillon “What state are we in now?”
-kids, 5 minutes into a 15-hour road trip
@amydillon “Sorry I was skeptical about your cough.”
-my new line of Get Well cards
@amydillon It’s not a family vacation until someone threatens to throw a prized possession from a moving vehicle.
@amydillon Day 1,459 of my son acting shocked and aggrieved when I tell him to go brush his teeth before bed.
@amydillon Cereal is a satisfying way to start the day if you’re having another breakfast within 45 minutes.
@amydillon When did we get a dog?
-me, getting into the wrong gray minivan at Target
@amydillon OTHER KIDS IN RESTAURANT: Restlessly coloring on a placemat waiting for food.
MY KIDS: Have already flipped over a booth & set it on fire.
@amydillon One of my sons says he likes my new haircut, and the other will have to twirl a sign outside a Mattress Firm to pay for college, I guess.