I don’t like doing the same things again so much that I can never be a serial killer.
People think i am so incapable of doing anything on my own that even if i commit suicide they would say it was murder.
I threw caution to the wind.caution is my little brother.
My friend likes going out.Recently he went out of his mind.
They say genius skips a generation.In our case it fell off our family tree and died.
An autocorrect with a pulse is called a wife.
My ex was a true professional.she said “you are fired” when we broke up.
I am not afraid to stand up to my wife when she is not looking.
I killed a girl who posted too many selfies.I think i can claim selfie-defence.
wish there was an edit option when d atm shows ur account balance!