Either this rapid COVID test is defective or I didn’t pee on it long enough.

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I can’t get out of bed, my Fitbit is charging and my steps won’t count


going over to my buddy’s house and opening all of his treasure chests to see if there’s any items in there that i need


Cw: Ignorance is bliss

Me: Explains why you’re so happy

HR: It’s good to see you again


Canadian Army training is 6 weeks of learning how to throw a snowball.


Garfield creator breaks silence to give impassioned speech. “It’s pronounced Jarfield” he says through tears


Twelve years ago today, my brother gave me one of his kidneys. I still can’t believe that he did it. I wasn’t even sick.


*walks down street*

*panties drop left and right*

*thinks, “shouldn’t have bought so many panties”*

*picks up panties*

*continues home*