The trend of people going back to film cameras is a great reminder that new technology isn’t the best for everything, and also that not everyone is good at photography.
You Might Also Like
when i say i like when older men tell me what to do i am talking about yoda and his teachings
You can tell it’s laundry day because I’m wearing flippers and a Viking helmet
ME [licking my fingers clean]: do you have a plate for the bones
CORONER: what the hell have you done
We have to buy a new toaster because my son tried using the icing packet from his toaster strudel as a potholder to protect his fingers and dropped it in the toaster, where it melted and oozed icing all over.
But in his defense, it didn’t say not to do that on the box.
Interview Tip: When you get the “where do you see yourself in 5 years” question, don’t say “post-apocalyptic tribal warlord”.
I do my part to help the community by honking and being obnoxious when rich couples driving audi 4wds are surveying “charming properties” along the back roads
Q-TIPS WARNING LABEL: do NOT put these in your ears you WILL go deaf and probably die
EVERYONE: ima pretty much exclusively use them in my ears
I think my wife discovered that I opened a new bag of chips before the old one was finished. Just in case I suddenly disappear.
I’m calling the cops.
[blind date]
Her: Where’s your ink? Your profile said you had a sleeve.
Me: *pulls out sleeve of girl scout cookies*
a deranged scientist in every rickety old house on top of every hill on the outskirts of every town. that’s my promise, should i be elected
Whenever I lose my mind, I always look
for it in the refrigerator first
Cats are about as useful as a football bat.
Huh… I wonder if I should tell my friend that his back tattoo doesn’t say what he thinks it says.
“Oh, I get it!”
– Me, when I didn’t get it.
My weight loss plan is going so disastrously I’m giving serious consideration to getting a cannibal involved.
Who called it a washer repairman and a not a spin doctor?
“Іs that a ripped up shirt in your hair?”
Іt’s called a SCRUNCHIE dad. 🙄
“We’re not buying another toy until Mommy gets laid!” might not be the most appropriate thing to yell in ToysRUs.
My husband hates pickles so much he put consuming them in front of him as a dillbreaker in our pre-nup
Me: I want ice cr-
Girl who studied abroad: the gelato in Italy is soooo much better than ice cream. Trust me, I’ve been to Italy
People that tell us what sex gods they are..what do you want us to do with that information?
[first time]
HER: (handing me condom) Do you know how to put this on?
ME: They showed us in health class.
HER: Good.
ME: Okay, where’s the banana?
Sometimes I feel doomed in dating, but then a random internet man with a profile pic of Deadpool writes “that’s cause u havent been with me yet ;)” and I am filled with joy and hope
[family brunch]
Sister: We’d love you to be our daughter’s godmother.
Me: No thank you. Please pass the syrup.
I’ve been laughing for an hour straight
(Item doesn’t scan)
Me: Does that mean it’s free?
Cashier: You’re literally the 100th person to use that line today.
Me: Does being the 100th person to use that line today mean I get it for free?
Spiraling into madness while watching the slow texter’s dots bounce
Thieves have removed motorway signs in Yorkshire. Police are currently searching for Leeds.
I love meeting people whose three kids’ names are gibberish but whose dog is named Steve.