Me [coming in from walking the dog]: It’s raining bring your umbrella to the bus stop. Child: It’s not raining. Me: Um, yes. I was just outside. Child: I’M LOOKING outside and it’s not raining. Me: omg fine. Child: [leaves] … … … Child [coming back in]: I need my umbrella.
I saw a woman I work with in line at the pharmacy and instinctively said “hey what are you here for?” She blushed and didn’t respond in case you’re wondering about my ability to create awkward situations
For six years I have been occasionally going to a friend’s house to play Scrabble. Each time I’ve taken along an extra “E” tile and added it to his set. He is now playing with nine extra Es. He hasn’t actually noticed but complains about have too many Es every time.