A Riddler origin movie would be like 10 min long bc he’d only have to tell one riddle before getting beaten up and becoming a villain
Why do they put Valentines Day candy in a box shaped like a heart? It’s kind of like eating ice cream out of a lung…
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Genius move, Romeo & Juliet, for killing yourselves instead of getting married and spending the rest your lives wanting to kill each other.
put ‘er there pardner!
Me: I’m a mature adult
Me: my tooth hurts when I suck
Dentist: so you’re in constant pain
Haven’t you heard, Fanny packs are back.
Him: It’s just… I’ve never seen anyone eating boiled eggs out of one…
How to get a job on Game of Thrones:
Q: Can you act?
Q: Will you get naked?
Judge: You’re the prosecutor?
Judge: So then who is this?
Me: (flips hair) I’m the prosecutest.
i’ve grown my mustache down over my mouth and all the other ventriloquists here are wondering why they never thought of that before
Answer every question with “Yes, but is it deep-fried?”