From the speed at which it’s spread I’m wondering if wordle is a symptom of omicron.
You Might Also Like
Wife: I’ve blisters on my hands from the broom.
Me: Take the car next time!
Kinda hypocritical of me to complain about people who send mixed signals seeing as the mat in front of my door says “welcome”…
It’s so hot at work I need to wear as little clothes as possible without being sent to HR
THEM: “Pineapple should never be on pizza! It’s a fruit!”
ME: [taking a long drag on my cigarette] “Well, I have some bad news for you about where tomato sauce comes from, kid.”
wife & I started scheduling date night between midnight & 7am, we just sleep the whole time, but at least we’re doing something together
they should make stand up horror. i’m tired of laughing, i wanna scream at a bar
“Are you fine being hugged while you pee?” is a question someone should’ve asked me before I had kids.
Me: I like how you dyed all the meat green for St. Patrick’s Day.
Chipotle manager: It’s St. Patrick’s Day?
Schrödinger’s cookie
