“I don’t think Gay Guys should be able to get abortions”
-Me when someone asks me a question that I don’t know the answer to.
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馃ぃ馃槀
yeah 馃槶
teacher: can anyone tell me what poor mental health looks like
me *raises hand*
teacher: yes good example
“It’s ok to double dip if you eat the whole bowl of chips & salsa by yourself!”
I shout as I swat my date’s hand away
“Blind dates are fun!”
I found an old avocado under the seat of my truck yesterday. It was guacamoldy.
If you’ve been waiting me to drop a lent tweet, I tried coming up with one and gave up.
No. I wasn鈥檛 being sarcastic.
I was being a giraffe.
[spelling bee]
Your word is ‘monosyllabic’
“Can you describe it in a sentence?”
Yes
Chris: I don’t care.
Kris: I don’t kare either.
Me: do you love natural peanut butter, but hate stirring it?
Construction Boss: I鈥檓 not questioning the concept, it鈥檚 just not your cement mixer