@TicklesMubbut Fun With Magnets: Monday Edition
@ninjadinosaur1 Oh your boyfriend proposed? Well I just realized my new dress has pockets, so I think it’s obvious who’s having a better day.
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@TicklesMubbut 
@notalogin People who say “go big or go home” seriously underestimate my willingness to go home. Like, it’s literally my only goal for most of the day.
@oPinotNated I’m like Helen of Troy. Not in the sense of being breathtakingly beautiful, but in the sense of pissing people off and starting wars
@Brewsker RT if you are my car keys and I can’t find you
@mydmac I can’t wait for Halloween so that I can walk around with a bloody carving knife without being questioned.
@LMemeit 9: (watching YouTuber play old school Mario)
Me: That’s the game I used to play when I was a kid.
9: You were alive back then?
@ronnui_ I think it’s cool when websites don’t show what a shirt looks like on a person. Wow it looks great folded up floating in the Great Void, that’s exactly how I am going to wear it.
@Fickle_Filly Ain’t no mountain high enough
Ain’t no valley low enough
Ain’t no high-security psychiatric hospital strong enough
To keep me from yooou
@UncleDuke1969 Me: WOW. Look at those legs!
Her: Thank you.
M: They’d look great around my neck!
H: Hey!
M: Wish I’d brought my saw.
H: WHAT?!?
M: Nothing.
@JohnLyonTweets Doing the New York Times crossword puzzle in pen means you’re smart unless you’re doing it on an iPad.