A couple years ago, I met with a founder who asked me what my thoughts were about starting a company in the credit card space. I told him it was a terrible idea.
Today, his company is growing like crazy and makes millions of dollars every year.
Lesson: Do not ask me for advice
You Might Also Like
I need a pain relieving patch that covers my whole body
Hate when other parents at school drop off act like they’re better than me just because they remembered to bring all of their children
One time my dad caught me doing homework and made me eat an entire pack of calculators
If you think your life is awful my mom keeps track of my “cycle” and just told me that I’m ovulating and that I should mingle more.
I just went for a morning run on the beach so it’s nice to know that exercise can ruin any setting.
I used to be one of these chefs who always swore and shouted until I discovered oven mitts.
#ChefDay #RubbishJokes
professor x: what’s your power?
me: i have super vision
professor x: oh?
mom: stop talking to strangers
All I want for Christmas is a survivalist training course so I can finally move to the woods, go off the grid, and not participate in society anymore until the government hunts me down and begs me to help them with a matter of national security, which I refuse.
I’m not surprised you had a facelift..but it looks like you are.
When life hands you lemons be thankful God didn’t slip and hit the demons button
I followed this woman on a bike with an empty baby seat for a half a mile yelling, “your baby jumped out!” before she gave me the finger.
*grabs knife, cuts forehead, lies on floor*
Wife walks in: “WHAT HAPPENED?”
“A burglar came in right when I was about to clean the house”
Guys, you don’t have to be a priest to shoot a baby with a water pistol. Literally anyone can do it.
With the passing of Hugh Hefner, we must now turn the page on an American icon.
*Pages stick together
Once I get this cortisone cream on it’s gonna be all over for you itches.
Don’t invite me over unless you are trying to secretly transfer a cursed object to me.
this morning at 7-eleven i saw a lizard next to the coffee maker and the cashier said “no worries that’s just marvin, he likes the smell”
This is my main handbag, and this is the handbag I have to fit everything that doesn’t fit in my main handbag
So hopping on a bandwagon is bad but falling off the wagon is also bad. Which is it society? Where is the acceptable orientation relative to a wagon?
“Necessity is the mother of invention” okay I’m hooked, who’s the dad, is he still in the picture are you guys still together
Photosynthesis is the process used by plants to convert a picture into a thousand words
I saved a ton money on a security system by hanging a picture of my paycheck on the front door.
british people be having sex like:
mmmm yes splendid ah indeed scrumptious carry on good heavens i’m arriving
I had no idea we were millionaires until I just saw my husband casually rip off 3 or 4 paper towels at once.
If doctors were truly empathetic they would wear backless gowns too
this isn’t as bad as i thought it was going to be.
-my 12yo complimenting dinner
Me: After all these years, I feel like all you offer me is false support
Limb technician:…well it’s kinda my job Greg, otherwise you’d be hopping home.
Me: That’s a very interesting sculpture
Her: It’s Mayan
Me: Yes, I know it’s yours. You don’t have to be a jerk about it
[Restaurant]
Me *has a sip and nods at date* yes, that’s fine, we’ll have a bottleWaiter: One ketchup coming up