Watching movies with kids:

If he/she hasn’t seen it, eons and billions of questions.

If he/she has seen it, eons and billions of spoilers.

You Might Also Like


If men had periods our commercials would be awesome…


Sober me: I hate drunk people

Me after first drink: WHERE MY DRUNK PEOPLE AT


When you go in the other room I ask your dog what you look like naked.


If you can’t remember my name, just say ‘donuts’. I’ll turn around and look.


2 found a calculator and is typing away very intensely on it

I call her name and I got a dirty look and a very nasty “Hold on!”, and back to typing

So I’ve decided to say her name 32 times, ask for juice 15 times, ask for 58 snacks, and have 3 meltdowns


Avril Lavigne and Chad Kroeger’s engagement proves that not only is love blind, it’s also deaf.


am i supposed to have a separate mouth with which to kiss my mother please advise