You’re so vain, you probably think me driving by your house 27 times at 2 a.m. wearing all black with binoculars is about you, don’t you.

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People who replace “Christ” with “X” are missing the whole point of what the ChristBox 360 is about.


People who make up phrases and try to pass them off as popular sayings are just throwing meat to the monkeys in the middle of a maelstrom.


Alexa is the ouija board I won’t allow in my own house, but will use in yours.


Your heart beats faster, your knees go weak, you start to sweat. Is this love? No you’re probably hypoglycemic


Dipping your cats in blue paint and watching them chase each other is 1000x more entertaining than Avatar.


God: let there be light!

vampires: wtf dude we were invincible til now


Why can’t I be rubied or diamonded. NOOO. I had to be jaded.