Remember: You are like a snowflake. Beautiful. Unique. White. Only here for a short time. People get mad when you sit on their cars.
Captain Crunch is basically an exfoliator for your mouth
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My surgeon said NO drinking for 24 hours, then we both laughed.
Poor superman.he can’t go commando without the whole world noticing
The only good comments section online is on recipes
eating cereal in the shower isn’t saving me as much time as i thought.
I use awkward numerical range description anywhere between 13 and 4 times a day.
Okay Canada. You’ve made your point.
Will you take winter back now?
What helps a pedophile walk and do his job?
A Candy Cane.
If pedicures were called toe jobs, men would get them, too.
Ahhh December 1st. Time to start using Santa as a threat.